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"I always have a problem liking things that I'm told I should like."
    -- Karl Pilkington
"I remember hearing that you're supposed to be able to see the Great Wall of China from the moon. But that has got to be bollocks because even as I stood right next to this bit, I had problems seeing it."
    -- Karl Pilkington

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"In spite of everything that has happened, I still believe that people are really good at heart."
    -- Anne Frank
"Even death is not to be feared by one who has lived wisely."
    -- Buddha
"I like to deliver more than I promise instead of the other way around."
    -- Dorothy Uhnak

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Carnac The Magnificent

May your Perrier water be secretly bottled in Tijuana.

May your platform shoes fail you in a camel pasture.

May a love-starved fruit-fly molest your sister's nectarines.

May a desert weirdo lower his figs into your mother's soup.

May the Shah of Iran seek refuge under your sister's skirt.

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