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"The first purpose of comedy is to make people laugh. Anything deeper is a bonus. Some comedians want to make people laugh and make them think about socially relevant issues, but comedy, by the very nature of the word, is to make people laugh. If people aren't laughing, it's not comedy. It's as simple as that...Without the laughter it becomes poetry or public speaking or a soliloquy; it isn't comedy anymore."
    -- Trevor Noah
"I love HIV tests. You don't need to study or learn a thing. As long as your books are covered you're fine."
    -- Trevor Noah

Popular Quotes
"The truth about your own life is not always easy to accept, and sometimes hasn't even occurred to you."
    -- Anna Quindlen
"People seldom refuse help, if one offers it in the right way."
    -- Arthur Christopher Benson
"Before God we are all equally wise - and equally foolish."
    -- Albert Einstein

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Carnac The Magnificent

May your Perrier water be secretly bottled in Tijuana.

May your platform shoes fail you in a camel pasture.

May a love-starved fruit-fly molest your sister's nectarines.

May a desert weirdo lower his figs into your mother's soup.

May the Shah of Iran seek refuge under your sister's skirt.

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