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"Teaching a child not to step on a caterpillar is as valuable to the child as it is to the caterpillar."
    -- Bradley Millar
"The only poll that matters is on election night."
    -- Kamala Harris
"The root of violent prejudice of any kind is casual prejudice."
    -- Steve Hofstetter
"We cannot tolerate a perspective that is about going backward and not understanding women have agency. Women have value. Women have authority to make decisions about their own lives and their own bodies."
    -- Kamala Harris

Popular Quotes
"The quality of the thought that a person has got inside and sought from outside is likely to decide the quality of the people that has been brought into his life."
    -- Anuj Somany
"Did you hear about the English teacher who was fired? She is suffering from post-grammatic stress disorder."
    -- Martin Jakob Storrow
"No one is pro-abortion."
    -- Barack Hussein Obama


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John Oliver Quotes

Drug companies are a lot like high school boyfriends. They're much more concerned with getting inside you than being effective once in there.Get Image

The only appropriate question to ask a poly sci major is 'was it weird moving back in with your parents after college.'Get Image

Flip flops are clearly just lingerie for foot fetishists.Get Image

Ostriches are scary horse birds. I don't like them.Get Image

Banjos are just guitars whose parents are cousins.Get Image

Photo of John OliverBiography of John Oliver:

An English comedian, writer, producer, podcaster, actor, media critic, and television host. He is widely known in the U.S. for hosting HBO's Last Week Tonight with John Oliver and for his work on The Daily Show with Jon Stewart. He also co-hosts the satirical comedy podcast The Bugle and hosted John Oliver's New York Stand-Up Show on Comedy Central. In 2013, Oliver spent eight weeks as the guest host of The Daily Show. Oliver then left the show at the end of 2013 and began hosting Last Week Tonight on 27 April 2014. He plays a recurring character, Professor Ian Duncan, on the television series Community.

Oliver first appeared at the Edinburgh Festival Fringe in 2001 as part of The Comedy Zone, a late-night showcase of newer acts, where he played the character of an "oleaginous journalist." He performed his debut solo show in 2002 and returned in 2003. In 2004 and 2005, he collaborated with Andy Zaltzman on a double act and co-hosting Political Animal, with various acts performing political material. After moving to New York City for The Daily Show, Oliver began performing stand-up in small clubs around the city and later headlined shows in larger venues. Oliver's first stand-up special, entitled John Oliver: Terrifying Times, debuted on Comedy Central in 2008 and was later released on DVD. Since 2010, Oliver has hosted four seasons of John Oliver's New York Stand-Up Show.




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