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"As they sat in traffic, we slowly rolled past the long line of luxury cars they had in their caravan, looking into each one until we pulled up to the front vehicle and found who we were seeking."
    -- Duane Keith Davis
"They want to put me in jail for life? That is just something I got to do."
    -- Duane Keith Davis
"I sang because they promised I would not be prosecuted."
    -- Duane Keith Davis
"I would rather be poor than do anything besides YouTube."
    -- Jimmy Donaldson
Popular Quotes
"Learn the art of patience. Apply discipline to your thoughts when they become anxious over the outcome of a goal. Impatience breeds anxiety, fear, discouragement and failure. Patience creates confidence, decisiveness, and a rational outlook, which eventually leads to success."
    -- Brian Adams
"If you give your son only one gift, let it be enthusiasm."
    -- Bruce Barton
"The mind is not a vessel to be filled but a fire to be kindled."
    -- Plutarch

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Jack Handey Quotes

I hope that someday we will be able to put away our fears and prejudices and just laugh at people.Get Image
Consider the daffodil. And while you're doing that, I'll be over here, looking through your stuff.Get Image
I believe in making the world safe for our children, but not our children's children, because I don't think children should be having sex.Get Image
If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down? We might, if they screamed all the time, for no good reason.Get Image
I hope, when they die, cartoon characters have to answer for their sins.Get Image



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