Jack Handey Quotes
Sometimes I think you have to march right in and demand your rights,even if you don't know what your rights are, or who the person is you're talking to. Then on the way out, slam the door.Get Image
If you're in a war, instead of throwing a hand grenade at the enemy, throw one of those small pumpkins. Maybe it'll make everyone think how stupid war is, and while they are thinking, you can throw a real grenade at them.Get Image
If you ever crawl inside an old hollow log and go to sleep, and while you're in there some guys come and seal up both ends and then put it on a truck and take it to another city, boy, I don't know what to tell you.Get Image
When you go in for a job interview, I think a good thing to ask is if they ever press charges.Get Image
If I had a mine shaft, I don't think I would just abandon it. There's got to be a better way.Get Image
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